I forgot to tell you.
I turned off all my social media notifications. I much prefer screaming into a void to the tune of a symphony for a crater, then catching up on the commentary. I’ve never been a performer, I just want to capture things.
Sometimes it’s my face. Or half of. Or my words. & I remind myself these are your stupid rules. & that no one actively hates you. Stop being insecure.
In lieu of being strange & wonderful in rose colored clouds of vapor, I’ve been writing, but you have to find it. & making art out of to do lists. Publishing copy. Teaching my friends (& strangers) how to build websites. Volunteering. Reading. Taking deep breaths. Sleeping too much. Procrastinating. Forgetting. Making lists. Distracting myself.
Will revert after Tuesday.
Things I have given myself over the past year for my birthday because I am incredibly fortunate & have a beautiful life despite us all being doomed sooner or later:
Freedom from the corporate world
A legit corset.
A subscription to nicotine gum.
Fuck Trump Lipstick
Chocolate brown hair dye.
A strawberry dress.
Apparently it’s that easy.
I’m very tired
& I just close my eyes.
After serious talks about passive aggressiveness.
It’s no secret it was.
After sleeping on it though, I think it gets better.
Because a lot of it made sense. And I think I am. & I mumble.
You: “What do want?”
Me: “Is that a philosophical question?”
Crisp fall weather
Chutes too narrow
Coffee shop cubicles
Cats named Kiki
Cozy beds & constant love